Grieving the Losses

In February, I wrote a blog posting on the topic of the power of love. As you know, I focused on the death of a loving father and his family. Since then I have experienced three events that have me reflecting on the purpose and meaning of life.

The first is that of the loss of our 15 year old male dog, Kippy, who died of a heart attack. It will be a week ago tomorrow. We still have our little female dog, Steffie, who is a great comfort to us.

The second took place just over two weeks ago when I was informed that my best friend of 49 years was diagnosed with a brain bleed and is struggling to cope with it. She epitomizes what a health conscious person with regular exercise and sensible nutrition would look like. It appears a simple fall resulted in this condition.

The third has been with me over the past five years. Just over two years ago my younger sister by 10 years was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. When I called her last night at the nursing home where she is for a week of respite care, I found her sad, lonely and depressed. If only I could be with her at this time, but I am a day’s journey away from her.

These three experiences have come together in such a way that I realize I am grieving their losses. How does one cope? How do I cope?

I find myself pondering, seemingly distracted, needing time to reflect away from people so I can make sense of it in my life. It strips away the outer coating of what is unimportant and forces me to seek inward to the depths of my being. I become aware of the reality of life in all its starkness and realize what is important is intangible.

The quality of my life is based on love, gratitude and caring for others. My relationships with my family and friends are paramount. Looking back over the past 15 years, I see how important it is to be grateful, to love and to care for others. Those others are my extended family which includes the wider community, the earth and all its creatures and our world. Surrounding myself with these qualities I can bring peace to all I meet in the course of my daily life.

I grieve my losses but I also know and reflect on the gifts I have given by these very people, by my own healthiness and ability to live a fulfilled and happy life.

I find I am asking myself: By what qualities am I living?

Even as I grieve, I am grateful for the giftedness of loving people in my life. I am happy that I am healthy so that I can help others and bring hope and peace to those who need it. I have many sources of support, people and books to help me cope with daily stresses and heartaches I am experiencing. I believe in the goodness of people and love that we share together. I trust that, ‘this too shall pass’ and I will continue living an abundant life.

Just as Spring gives us hope, sunshine, flowers and trees that will bloom again, so we too will experience all the beauty and happiness we are entitled to in this wonderful universe.

Just as Kippy crossed over the rainbow to the bridge of a better life, so we too can journey onward, knowing that we have within us all the hope and joy of Spring and Summer in our hearts!

Until next time, keep smiling and be at peace,

Bride